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So I have to say I am 1 lucky lady.

I truly honestly feel that I found the last decent man on earth.

Man and I started out as strangers who worked together, we became friends, when I was going thru a very rough patch in my life we bonded over superhero movies, and he helped me navigate through all the mess and stress and became my best friend. And then shortly after that our friendship became love.

And I haven’t looked back since.

Ryan

I mean look at that face! How can I not be head over heels in love with him!

 

For the 1st time in my life I truly feel I have a partner in life. Someone who sees me as an equal, someone who loves me even with all of my craziness, someone who is committed to truly doing all the dirty work it takes to be in a realationship these days and someone who treats me like a freaking princess.

Like just now as I’m writing this I literally just got a text from man saying he wasnt’ going to his side job tonight because he wants to hang out with me. (heart melting)

The other day he stopped me while I was walking dogs and he was on his way to work to tell me that he unloaded the dishwasher and picked up the living room. Just because. And EVERYDAY he makes the bed ( as long as my lazy butt isn’t still in it) :+) I have literally never known a man to be so thoughtful, helpful, and kind.

Lake

Cheesin it up at the lake!

We literally have the best and healthiest relationship I have ever been in. We talk about our problems, we support and motivate each other, he makes me feel beautiful, and important, I make ( well I hope I make ) him feel that all the hard work he is doing is so valued and appreciated as I know that he is making a better life for us, B, and Baby W. He knows how important having god in our relationship is to me, and he is working on finding his way back to him. For Pete’s sake this bearded, tattooed, bear of a man helps teach 5th grade Sunday School without even being asked ( and 1/2 the time I think the kids like him better! ) Words can not even begin to explain how much my heart is filled with love and joy for him. Plus…we have so much darn fun together!

CaptainAmerica

Marvel Movie Night! ‘Call your mom can you bunk over?’ -‘I was having 12% of a moment’

and I mean we were pretty much made for each-look how cute we are together even back in the day

Kids

A lovely Christmas gift from his sister……we both still give eachother these looks

 

He just makes me smile. I feel so loved. And no I’m not saying our relationship is perfect- He likes to yell when he gets upset, I like to make snide comments under my breath,  we both let outside influences sometimes creep into our relationship, and I’m sure we will have many more things that will come up, but at least with this man I know that he won’t let me just throw in the towel.

Man proposed a couple weeks ago. That’s right on my birthday he told me he wanted to give me my gift and he got down on one knee in front of my whole family,  presented me with this beautiful ring

engagment ringt

and asked me to join him and B in their lives and to Marry Him…..someday. It was the nicest sweetest most romantic thing it took me about 3 minutes after it happened to fully grasp what had happened and then the tears just came. On the way home that weekend- he wanted me to know that he knew I wasn’t ready to get married right away, but that he wanted me to know that he loves me and is committed to Baby W and our life and he wanted me and everyone to know that he was. Plus he wanted to “shut up all the people giving us crap”. He also said that when I finally actually agree to do it, and set a date I will get a bigger rock ( but please don’t do that now cause I need to save) :+)

That brought on more tears. I expressed to him how I want to marry him, but I am soooooo fearful of repeating my past mistakes. I worry I shall get a “grass is greener” complex like I do sometimes when things are good- I can be self destructive……like very self destructive. I worry about hurting him- because while my Ex hurt me very very much, and treated me poorly. I made my own mistakes, and Man is just to damn perfect to do that to. He is literally the LAST person on this earth I want to hurt- and I so worry about the bad girl side of me- the one I have spent years overcoming-creeping back in.

But as a dear friend and church leader reminded me when I told her- “does worrying add one minute to your life” I can not worry and waste the time and life god has blessed me with. I must pray and trust in god that this time around things will be different, Man is different, I am different, and this time around true love will conquer all.

But I’m still not setting date.

I do apologize if this was to mushy for some of you. I normally like to keep things like this private- but I do feel so lucky, and so blessed, and after he unloaded the dishwasher at 6:15 am for me….well I just wanted to brag.

And man if you are reading this-For infinity…….& beyond.

BigCedar

 

 

 

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